Today was my 29th birthday. Which means that, in just one short year's time, I will have been breathing oxygen for 30 damn years. That's a long freaking time. Especially since, in high school, I was voted Most Likely to Die From Asphyxiating on Vomit Before the Age of 25*.
Anyway, it was a pretty normal day. Went to work. The kids made me birthday cards, which is always cool. Every year I get new homemade cards from Emily and Xander which serve as a benchmark for their progress as little people. Every year I can see their skills and creativity growing and it feels good. It's funny that my birthdays have become less about me and more about my family, but I guess that's the way it's supposed to be.
I ate O'Charley's for dinner tonight, which was a rarity because Debbie usually makes dinner. I had their pecan/chicken tender salad. If salads could have children, I would want this salad to bear my children. It's badass.
I did get a really cool toy for my birthday. The wife and kids got me a new mountain bike. You can see a pic of it here. That's not a picture of MY bike, but it's the exact same model and color and everything. It's not a competitive bike by any means, and I won't be descending any mountains with it, but I wanted something that wouldn't bankrupt me which could also handle easy to moderate trails without falling apart. I can't wait to try it out, hopefully this weekend.
*That's not really true. I made that whole bit up.
Today is the September equinox, which, for myself and all the other residents of the northern hemisphere, means today is the first day of fall. We're coming out of an exceptionally hot and dry summer here in Northern Kentucky, so that's good news.
I think if I had to choose, I'd pick the fall as my favorite of all the seasons. It has more personality than the others. Plus, it's the season of my birthday. Also, it's home to my favorite holiday: Halloween.
As a way to welcome the fall and to commemorate the summer, Debbie and I took the kids on a short hike this morning to Middle Creek Park, which isn't too far from Boone County Cliffs. It was pretty cool, except for the swarms of mosquitoes (the drought has left lots of standing water where a creek used to be) and an encounter with one pissed off dog that, for some reason, really didn't like the kids. There are at least three distinct trails in the park. We stayed on Trail 1, but we saw signs that pointed to Trail 2 and something called Mud Road. Trail 1, with its wide, level, well-worn paths, was very hospitable. I didn't really see any of Mud Road, but Trail 2 looked like it may be a bit more challenging.
I plan on getting a mountain bike here in the next week or so and I think Middle Creek will be a great place to break the bike (and my legs) in.
Looking forward to a great fall season.
Rob Zombie's 2007 remake of the horror classic Halloween was met with plenty of skepticism. Perhaps rightfully so. Hollywood hasn't exactly been kind to the Halloween franchise over the years. And when the reviews started pouring in for Mr. Zombie's go at it, they were less than flattering. Hell, it only scored a 23% from rottentomatoes.com.
To put that into perspective, 23% is only 19 percentage points higher than what House of the Dead (Uwe Boll's insult to both gamers and moviegoers everywhere) scored from the same website, and it is actually 16 points LOWER than what Freddy vs. Jason scored.
It's hard not to be influenced by numbers like that when you go to watch a movie, but I tried. And you know what? The 2007 Halloween remake really wasn't all that bad.
Sure, it had some faults, but most movies have at least a few of those. First of all, nearly a third of the film was spent tracking young Michael Meyers. So much time was spent developing the Michael-as-a-kid storyline that, by the time he finally grows up and starts stabbing people, you almost feel like you're supposed to identify with him on some level. I don't know, maybe that was intentional. Rob Zombie did ask you to identify with sadistic murderers in The Devil's Rejects. But come on. This is Michael Fucking Meyers. He's a force of nature. You can't identify with that. And he certainly doesn't need explanation beyond "he had a real bad childhood and now he stabs people a lot."
Another thing that kind of bugged me was the sheer size of Michael in this movie. He was played by 6' 8" WCW star Tyler Mane. This was a little excessive if you ask me. I know Michael Meyers is supposed to look large and commanding, but in many of the shots, he looked like ... a professional wrestler in a Michael Meyers mask.
Yet despite its flaws, there is one major thing that this movie does right where all of the previous Halloween sequels have failed: it does a pretty good job of capturing the feel of the original. I mean, after the whole Michael-as-a-kid bit, anyway. Obviously no movie will ever recreate that feel perfectly, but this one takes a mighty swing at it.
I think the biggest reason for the poor reviews of the new Halloween is that many of the reviewers are naturally comparing it to the original. Well, you just can't do that and expect to get a fair reading. You have to view this as a standalone film in order to appreciate it. While the other Halloween sequels fail while standing either beside the original or alone, this one can stand on its own feet. Well, again, after the kid Michael part.
I guess what I'm saying is that, if you can forget that the first Halloween existed, you'll get at least two-thirds of a good movie when you watch Rob Zombie's remake. And that's better than what you get from most movies.
Clive Owen
Paul Giamatti
30,000 bullets
+ 1 lactating hooker
= awesome
OK, so it's not going to win any Oscars, but Shoot 'Em Up, the Clive Owen/Paul Giamatti action flick, does deserve to be recognized. Not for being particularly good, but for being fun.
In the opening scene, the film announces its intent. After Mr. Smith (Owen) kills the first mook by shoving a carrot into his mouth and punching the root vegetable through the back of the guy's head, he says, "eat your vegetables." At that point I said to myself, ah, so THAT'S the kind of movie I'm watching.
And that's not at all a bad thing, mind you. Movies like this, in my opinion, deserve to be judged in a category all their own. If I were to score this movie up against all the other movies out there, I'd be forced to give it a D. Yet, when scored against other movies of its kind, I'd give it an A.
You see, this is the kind of movie that you can pop in, switch your brain to auto pilot, and come out on the other end convinced it was the greatest movie ever. Other movies that I think are in this category are Cranked, Kung Fu Hustle, and just about any Jackie Chan movie ever made.
If you have trouble suspending your disbelief, you'll probably not enjoy Shoot 'Em Up. The fight scenes are blatantly ridiculous, but they are consistently so. The carrot through the back of the head is just one example of this. But if you've got no trouble accepting things such as that, this movie might be for you.
The performances are pretty good, especially for an action film. Clive Owen's always a plus. Sure, he doesn't have a lot of range (or if he does, Hollywood's not letting him use it), but it's still cool to watch him fire a gun. And Paul Giamatti makes a great bad guy. He pulls off the evil, sadistic, criminal genius very well.
Fun movie. Check it out.
Do you wear a bluetooth headset wherever you go, whether you're expecting an important call or not? Have you ever slept with your headset on? Have you ever worn two headsets at the same time? Then you may have a problem and this message is for you.
Sure, bluetooth technology is great and powerful. But with great power comes great responsibility. And you've gotta be responsible enough to take the headset off when you're not on a call. I'm sure you think it makes you look cool, and I'm sure all your friends are doing it too, but it doesn't make you look cool. It makes you look like an ass. And when you're with your friends and you're all wearing your headsets together, it compounds that assness to the point that the people around you may start thinking about harming you physically.
Maybe you think it makes you look important. Well let me tell you something. No one in the world is so important that they have to be ready to answer an incoming call on the first ring. Well, maybe Oracle. But you're not Oracle, are you? Unless you are, in which case ... cool.
If you want to wear it at the office, or even while you're driving, hey that's fine. But if you're in social situations outside of work hours, you don't need it. It gives people the impression that you're only half listening to them when they speak to you. Plus, if you've got one of the models with the light that flashes every few seconds, that's REALLY distracting. It makes you look like Geordi La Forge without his visor on.
Just take it off. Your family misses you. If you don't want to do it for yourself, then do it for them.
This has been a public service announcement from Andy, who reminds you to "just take it off."
I spent many of my key formative years growing up in Kentucky's Daniel Boone National Forest. There wasn't a whole hell of a lot else to do, so I spent a lot of time alone in the forest and, as a result, I love hiking. It centers me and, even though I might be walking a trail that is strenuous and tiring, it gives me energy. I haven't really been since Debbie and I started producing children and I've missed it.
That's why I jumped at the chance when Jason asked if I wanted to go check out a trail that he had heard of not far from my house in the Boone County Cliffs Nature Preserve. Emily was a bit under the weather, but Xander was up for it, so I packed a backpack this morning and we started out.The website for the park says the trails are "moderate to strenuous," but I would say the main path is easy to moderate at most. It's made up mostly of gentle slopes and, aside from the occasional step built into the path, there's really no climbing to be done at all. Here's a picture that I took and this is a good example of about 90% of what you'll encounter on the main trail.
There are plenty of side trails that are definitely in the strenuous range and, while we didn't get to explore those too well, we could tell that they lead to some really cool stuff and some nice views.
It was a good time and I can't wait to go back to check out the rest of the trails. You can see some more pictures that I took on our short hiking expedition here. Also, check out Jason's blog post for his report.
The worst possible thing has happened. It's been like a million degrees for as long as I can remember now and my AC went out today. OK, maybe that's not the WORST possible thing. The wost possible thing would probably be if I were forced to watch 'N Sync videos for all eternity while Chuck Norris delivers roundhouse kicks to my nards. But this was pretty bad too.
The wife calls me while I'm at work to give me the bad news. She says she thinks it's the thermostat. So I leave work early and drive to my local Lowe's store to pick one up. As soon as I pull into the parking lot, I feel out of place. The lot is full of large, very manly pickup trucks, while I pull into a spot in my four-door sedan with car seats in the back. But that's OK. I'm used to it.
I go in, and with the help of a friendly employee, I find the thermostats in the electrical department, right where they ought to be. I tell him I'm looking for a programmable thermostat, and I ask him if he knows anything about therm because I want to make sure I get the right one. One that's compatible with my AC device. He tells me that he doesn't know much about these products, but Jim would be able to help me.
Presently, Jim arrives on scene. He's a burly, bearded man. The friendly employee tells Jim that I'm in the market for a programmable thermostat. And I tell Jim that I just want to find out which ones will work with my unit (heh heh ... "unit"). Jim and Friendly Employee Guy both assure me that all of the 'stats that they sell are universal and will work with any type of AC device.
So I think I'm done. But then, Friendly Employee Guy walks off and leaves me with Jim, who promptly asks me, "how many square feet do you have in your house?"
"I don't know. I have a small ranch," I answer truthfully.
Then Jim launches into a diatribe regarding people having cooling devices for their homes that are not powerful enough to cool their second story. This quickly evolves into other ways that foolish homeowners aren't getting the most out of their cooling devices. This is all good information, but I just want to make my purchase and get out. But he's very passionate about this and I can tell this is an important subject for him, so I indulge him by nodding politely at intervals during his speech, all the while I'm trying to imprint this message into his mind: dude. I have a ranch-style house. I have no second story. And I don't care about this other crap that you're talking about.
My powers are weak apparently because he doesn't stop until his phone rings. I take the opportunity to thank him, grab a $30 thermostat, and get the hell out of there.
I get home, break out my tool box, which is probably laughable by my father-in-law's standards, but which suits my meager purposes very well, and I get to installin'. Only, something is obviously not right. There are all these extra wires spilling out of the wall that seemingly have no place in the new thermostat.
Debbie does some digging and finds out that we have a heat pump. I'm still not entirely sure what that is, but the thermostat that I bought clearly warns that it will not work with a heat pump. So, time for another trip to Lowe's, this time with family in tow.
I return the device that I had just bought two hours before and start looking for one that works with a heat pump. Luckily, Jim is nowhere in sight this time around. Unfortunately, the only one that I can find has a price tag of $100, which, granted is well worth the benefit of keeping the temperature in my house below Tatooine-like levels, but it's a little more than I'd like to spend, so we make a trip to The Home Depot.
I head straight for the electrical department, but I find no thermostats. I snare a passing employee and ask him if he can tell me where to find them.
"They're in Plumming," he says to me. "On an end cap across from aisle 30."
I find this to be odd and suspicious, but I go to aisle 30 anyway and there they are. And luckily, I find one that fits my needs for only $40. I grab it and go.
I get home, once again open my toolbox, and install the new device. It seems to work perfectly, only ... no cool air is coming from my vents. And the outside unit is not functioning.
Debbie discovers that service technicians were called out on two separate occasions to replace blown fuses in the AC unit for the previous owners of my house. So, I go outside and start poking around the thing.
After about 45 minutes of jabbing at various places, cursing the heavens, and pulling on things which I know neither the names nor functions of, I finally find the fuses. A quick internet search tells me that these fuses are cartridge fuses and that there is no way to visually tell if they are blown or not.
Jump in car. Drive to Home Depot. Buy new fuses for $10. Install said fuses. Damn thing still doesn't work. We'll have to call a service tech tomorrow I guess. We probably should have done that to begin with, but oh well. At least we got a snazzy new thermostat out of the whole thing. Plus I got to use my tools, which is always fun.
